Strawberries and Bananas... Er, Pineapples!

I had an interesting two-hour phone chat with Jane today. The entire two hours centered around Jane wondering whether or not to make a smoothie. Here's just a paraphrased snippet of our conversation, about an hour after she started contemplating the idea of smoothie-making:

(Jane = blue, me = pink)

“I’ve decided to make a smoothie.”
“How long did that take you to decide?”
“An hour or two.”
“JANE! That’s why you just look in the fridge, find chocolate cake, and take it out and eat it. No preparation, no having to choose.”
“Are you eating cake now?”
“Mmmm…”
“Sarah! You pig!”
“Hee…”
(in Jane’s baby voice): “Okay. Let’s get the stuff out…” CRASH!
“JANE! What happened?”
“Well, the thingy that I wanted was in this other thingy, and I couldn’t get it.”
*sigh*
“So, we get the strawberries out, and we find the ones that are ripe. OOH! This one’s pretty! And then there’s this one, and another one, and… EEEEW! This one looks funny!”
“For someone who just said she hated judging by appearances…” (a previous conversation reference)
“This one’s going away.”
“What, on its own?”
“Yes, Sarah, it’s walking out the door and out of our lives FOREVER! (pause) It’s time for the little strawberries and pineapples to have a nice, big union in the blender.”
“Union? Jane, that’s sick!”
“I was talking about a family reunion! What were you thinking?”
“Let’s not go there, Jane.”
“SARAH! Mind in the gutter, as always!”
“HEY!”
(pause)
“What do you want?”
“Huh?”
“You’re still talking to me. You must want something from me, just like everyone else.”
“Jane, it’s wise not to ask someone with their mind in the gutter what they want.”
“Oopsies. Well, I know you want a smoothie.”
“No, I don’t. I don’t like smoothies. Heck, I don't even like fruit!”
(GASP!) "You’re insulting my smoothies! I thought you were my best friend! Look! The strawberry is hurt! It’s crying! In the corner!”
“Poor thing... How in the world does a strawberry cry?”
“I put it under the faucet. When I wash it, it’s wet from its tears.”
“…Or the faucet.”
“Tears!”
“Faucet!”
“Your arguing is making the pineapples mad!”
“Ooh… I’m threatened.”
“They don’t like you, you…butt!”
“Wait. I was already a butt. [another reference to previous conversation] Does that make me a double-butt?”
“Yes. Wait! No. You don’t have a really big butt, so you’re a… an itty-bitty butt!”

Just thought it was funny and would at least explain the new endquote. Good night.

"The strawberries and pineapples are having a nice, big family reunion. What were you thinking?"